Finding Your Perfect Mentor: A Guide for Mentees

Three years later, she is an account director at Ogilvy in Chicago, thanks in part to the invaluable lessons imparted by her mentors.

“When you develop a mentor relationship, you gain so much confidence in an array of areas, including the ability to talk with people and ask for their feedback,” Jackson says. “In all these conversations with my mentors, I felt more sure of myself in preparing for a move and figuring out what I wanted next for my career.”

Regardless of where you are in your career—a recent graduate, a new manager, or a seasoned professional—everyone can use a mentor to help guide them. “We know from research that people with mentors get promoted faster, earn a higher salary, and are more satisfied with their careers,” says Wendy Murphy, an associate professor of management at Babson College and author of Strategic Relationships at Work: Creating Your Circle of Mentors, Sponsors, and Peers for Success in Business and Life.

While most professionals agree that having a mentor is beneficial, few people—especially early in their careers—know how to find a mentor and make sure it’s a productive and meaningful relationship.

Here are 10 tips to help you figure out what you’re looking for, identify the right mentor for you, and set yourself up for a successful mentorship.

1-Understand What a Mentor Is—and Isn’t

A mentor is someone who can act as your cheerleader and guide, encourage you to apply for new opportunities, and help you to navigate challenging situations such as transitioning to a new role or taking on a stretch assignment. Often your mentor will be someone working in the same industry as you and/or in a similar role—or someone working in an industry and/or type of role you want to transition to—who can help you figure out how to advance your career. While it’s possible to be mentored by a peer, most mentors will be at least a level or two ahead of you in their career track.

Keep in mind that a mentor is different from a sponsor. A mentor answers questions and offers advice, while a sponsor uses his or her connections to advocate for a younger or less experienced employee and actively participate in their career growth.

Most people end up having a long-term, one-on-one relationship with their mentor, and that’s how we typically envision mentorship, but it’s not the only option. There are many different forms of mentoring, including peer mentoring (with someone at the same level as you) and group mentoring (where you don’t meet one-on-one). Mentoring can also be done in bite-sized chunks. For instance, you might find someone with a specific skill or an experience you want to learn more about and ask if you can talk with them about it in a one-time, one-hour mentoring session.

“Traditional one-on-one mentoring is more personal, with intimate and in-depth conversations, but this type of mentoring may not be right for every situation,” says Kathie Patterson, Chief Human Resources Officer at Ally Financial in Detroit. “It depends on what you need and what you’re working toward.”

2. Be Clear About Your Goals

Before you even consider asking someone to be your mentor, you need to reflect on what you hope to learn and get out of the relationship, Patterson says. The goal of most mentoring relationships is to help you overcome a transition or hurdle or to become better in an area of work that you need more support or guidance in, she says.

Think about your purpose in seeking a mentor, Murphy says. Determine the gaps in your work performance and what you need to better understand about your industry or employer.

For instance, if your boss has suggested that you learn how to think on your feet in client meetings, consider which colleagues you’ve seen excel in that area who might be able to help you learn that skill. Or maybe you’ve been tasked with creating your first marketing plan and you want to ask for some advice on best practices without relying on your boss for help. Or you might be feeling like you’re ready for a promotion or a new role and could use some guidance on how to take that next step in your career.

3. Find the Right People to Mentor You

Once you pinpoint what skills you’re seeking help with or what questions have about your industry, look at the community around you, including coworkers, family friends, and your college alumni network, to find a potential mentor, says Emily Merrell, founder of Six Degrees Society, a Manhattan-based membership organization that helps women to build their professional networks.

Your mentor doesn’t need to be an executive. They can be just a few levels above you. In fact, someone three to five years ahead of you might have more practical and relevant advice than someone 20 or 30 years your senior, who may be less in touch with the day-to-day realities of someone at your level.

For example, if you're an engineer looking to grow into a management role, you might want to reach out to your RA from college who you always had a great rapport with and who’s been working as an engineering manager for a few years already. Or if you’re an entry-level marketer looking to become a specialist focusing on social media, you might look to the social media director you got to know at an internship you did a couple of years ago.

Don’t be surprised if you realize that one person is unable to help you in all the ways you’re looking to learn about your industry and grow your career. That’s OK. Remember that you can have multiple mentors at one time. “Think of them as your personal board of advisors,” Murphy says. They can include people at your own company who are embedded in the same workplace culture and people outside your office who can act as a sounding board, she says.